Thank you SO MUCH to those who have donated! We just knocked another $193 off what is owed, leaving us with $2,239.95!
If you're in the position to donate, please do! If not, please spread the word! Everything sold in my shop goes toward what's owed as does anything sold at shows. You can also find my goods at these amazing Toronto stores: Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, and Ransack the Universe.
Thanks to all... YOU ROCK!!!
xoxoxo
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
An artist's fight against Pseudotumour Cerebri and the resulting pain and vision deterioration.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Whoa! It's Been a While!
Wow. I am a baaaaad blogger! I suppose it's good in a way... it means I've been doing other stuff beside sitting at the computer feeling sorry for myself.
Things are going well, meaning I've taken up my art again. Sewing is challenging... what with all the threading needles and such, but luckily the bulk of my work is using larger needles and embroidery floss. I have the computer set up with large letters on the keyboard and I can zoom in on almost anything by clicking Ctrl and the Up arrow, which has been invaluable for graphic designing and printing notecards. So far I haven't found anything in the house that I can't do... key words being "in the house."
Unfortunately, I've been struggling outside of the house. I do so well inside I convince myself that I'll be equally at ease outdoors doing things like driving or "just running in" for something. Then, after leaving the house, I get hit with reality - I can't drive, I can't "just run in," I can't see. Inside I'm familiar with everything. I know where everything is. And the walls make finite scenery. Outside the wide open space makes me dizzy and anxious which I try to calm by looking at my feet or at the pavement just in front of where I'm walking.
A couple times I convinced myself that I was ok to drive. I haven't driven since April. Driving is one of my favorite things to do and I HATE not having the freedom to go where I want when I want. I believe if I concentrated real hard I'd be able to drive... but it'd have to be in bright weather and in medium traffic. I haven't given it a go yet. Husband doesn't think it's a good idea.
I almost got on transit... if walking 50 feet toward the bus stop counts. I hated transit before all this... I don't think this is going to make me love it.
Shopping takes forever. Instead of scanning a wall and grabbing what I need, I have to search item by item, holding them close to my eyes. The days of "running in" are over except for the obvious bread, milk, and other familiar items.
So I stay in the house, where I'm safe and in control. Husband and I have started taking walks which we hope will me get used to being outside the house (as well as help with the weight loss).
I hope it doesn't come across like I'm complaining, because I'm not. I'm thankful that my eyesight isn't getting any worse. If anything I'm just frustrated and disappointed.
Enough whining... as for my diet, I'm down 44lbs. and doing well. I love fitting into clothes that I haven't worn in ages! I have a doctor appointment with my ophthalmologist October 5th. We'll see if I still need to take the spinal fluid reducing pills and how my eyes are looking!
Again, I hate asking but, there is still an outstanding balance for my surgery (approximately $2,000). I know money doesn't grow on trees, but if you can donate a couple bucks it'd be greatly appreciated! If you want something for your money, feel free to peruse my SHOP. And I absolutely adore a challenge so if you want a custom order, feel free to contact me at kaoticekko [at] gmail [dot] com!
I thank everyone for their amazing support!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I'm even managing to do some shows! Check out The World Domination Schedule on my art blog We're All A Little Mad Here to find out where I'll be!
Anyway, I'm lurking. Thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Things are going well, meaning I've taken up my art again. Sewing is challenging... what with all the threading needles and such, but luckily the bulk of my work is using larger needles and embroidery floss. I have the computer set up with large letters on the keyboard and I can zoom in on almost anything by clicking Ctrl and the Up arrow, which has been invaluable for graphic designing and printing notecards. So far I haven't found anything in the house that I can't do... key words being "in the house."
Unfortunately, I've been struggling outside of the house. I do so well inside I convince myself that I'll be equally at ease outdoors doing things like driving or "just running in" for something. Then, after leaving the house, I get hit with reality - I can't drive, I can't "just run in," I can't see. Inside I'm familiar with everything. I know where everything is. And the walls make finite scenery. Outside the wide open space makes me dizzy and anxious which I try to calm by looking at my feet or at the pavement just in front of where I'm walking.
A couple times I convinced myself that I was ok to drive. I haven't driven since April. Driving is one of my favorite things to do and I HATE not having the freedom to go where I want when I want. I believe if I concentrated real hard I'd be able to drive... but it'd have to be in bright weather and in medium traffic. I haven't given it a go yet. Husband doesn't think it's a good idea.
I almost got on transit... if walking 50 feet toward the bus stop counts. I hated transit before all this... I don't think this is going to make me love it.
Shopping takes forever. Instead of scanning a wall and grabbing what I need, I have to search item by item, holding them close to my eyes. The days of "running in" are over except for the obvious bread, milk, and other familiar items.
So I stay in the house, where I'm safe and in control. Husband and I have started taking walks which we hope will me get used to being outside the house (as well as help with the weight loss).
I hope it doesn't come across like I'm complaining, because I'm not. I'm thankful that my eyesight isn't getting any worse. If anything I'm just frustrated and disappointed.
Enough whining... as for my diet, I'm down 44lbs. and doing well. I love fitting into clothes that I haven't worn in ages! I have a doctor appointment with my ophthalmologist October 5th. We'll see if I still need to take the spinal fluid reducing pills and how my eyes are looking!
Again, I hate asking but, there is still an outstanding balance for my surgery (approximately $2,000). I know money doesn't grow on trees, but if you can donate a couple bucks it'd be greatly appreciated! If you want something for your money, feel free to peruse my SHOP. And I absolutely adore a challenge so if you want a custom order, feel free to contact me at kaoticekko [at] gmail [dot] com!
I thank everyone for their amazing support!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I'm even managing to do some shows! Check out The World Domination Schedule on my art blog We're All A Little Mad Here to find out where I'll be!
Anyway, I'm lurking. Thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
MiniUpdate
So, I'm having a problem with my right calf... it feels like a constant charlie horse (muscle cramp) which started last Monday. The last time I had something like this they thought it was a blood clot, so I got sent for a full ultrasound workup. Nothing like someone pushing with all his might on the area that hurts! I've come to the conclusion that my body hates exercise: the first I started when my hubby and I took ballroom dancing classes and this one started after we bought sneakers for walking. etc. Coincidence? I think not! (I've checked and this doesn't seem to have any connection to the Posttumour Cerebri or the Diamox pills I'm on.)
However, my body will NOT get the best of me! My appointment ran late and hubby had to leave for his own doctor appointment. So I started walking in the direction of his doctor's office and ended up walking a mile... without dying! It's a Canada Day miracle! Of course my right leg hurt but I ignored it.
Oh yeah... and I'm up to 34lbs. lost! Woot woot!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
However, my body will NOT get the best of me! My appointment ran late and hubby had to leave for his own doctor appointment. So I started walking in the direction of his doctor's office and ended up walking a mile... without dying! It's a Canada Day miracle! Of course my right leg hurt but I ignored it.
Oh yeah... and I'm up to 34lbs. lost! Woot woot!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
One Month after the Surgery and my First Adjustment
So yesterday was the one month mark since my surgery. I had two appointments at the clinic: one with the nutritionist and one to get an adjustment. The nutritionist was pleased with how I'm doing, I just have to cut back more on carbs... which make me sad because I'm a sucker for sandwiches and cereal! But somehow I will survive! Then off I went to see one of the nurses who by feel injected the ring with something which made it tighten around the stomach. I was amazed that the nurse could find the injection sight without some sort of machine... really goes to show you the top-notch care the Surgical Weight Loss Centre provides. I would, without hesitation, recommend them to anyone! They are amazing!
So the total weight loss so far since April 30th is 28lbs. In the words of my family doctor: Holy crap! Hopefully the adjustment will help me lose even more!
As far as my eyesight, it's remained the same. No improvement but no further degradation either which is what we were aiming for. So I say "SUCCESS!"
Again, I'll be glad to answer any questions you might have! Just list 'em in the comments!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
2.5 Weeks After the Surgery
So it's been approximately two and a half weeks since my surgery. I feel pretty good... four of the five incisions are almost completely healed. The fifth was the most severe and is still sore. I went for a check-up and the nurse said everything looked good. I'm not losing weight as rapidly as before because I've started eating "real food" now. I'm on Week 3 of the recovery diet which is soft food: tuna, egg, cottage cheese, etc. (sushi on my birthday! Hey, it's soft!). Next week I'll be able to eat real food! The hardest time I'm having with this is eating more than once a day. That's a habit I picked up in college; there wasn't time to eat until dinner. And that's just as bad for you as over-eating all day long! But I have been trying!
Just a little update on the donation front - we'd like to thank a group of donors who would like to remain anonymous for their very large donation. Both my husband and I are extremely touched and overwhelmed with gratitude. Thank you.
And a huge thank you, of course, to all of you who have donated. By helping us financially you have lifted a huge burden and I'm able to concentrate on recovery instead of money! You all ROCK!
If you haven't made a donation and would like to, you can either use the Paypal button on the right or purchase something from my SHOP. We are still $2,933.55 away from our goal.
And some good news: I will be making my vending comeback on June 18th at THE CIRCUS CABARET ROADSHOW at the Blue Moon Pub! I will have *NEW* pins and cards. C'mon down... it'll be worth it... GUARANTEED!
Thanks again for all your support! You guys help me make it through! xoxoxo
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Just a little update on the donation front - we'd like to thank a group of donors who would like to remain anonymous for their very large donation. Both my husband and I are extremely touched and overwhelmed with gratitude. Thank you.
And a huge thank you, of course, to all of you who have donated. By helping us financially you have lifted a huge burden and I'm able to concentrate on recovery instead of money! You all ROCK!
If you haven't made a donation and would like to, you can either use the Paypal button on the right or purchase something from my SHOP. We are still $2,933.55 away from our goal.
And some good news: I will be making my vending comeback on June 18th at THE CIRCUS CABARET ROADSHOW at the Blue Moon Pub! I will have *NEW* pins and cards. C'mon down... it'll be worth it... GUARANTEED!
Thanks again for all your support! You guys help me make it through! xoxoxo
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Friday, May 28, 2010
Quick Update - Surgery, etc.
Hey everyone!
I had started an update and it started getting really in-depth and emotional and was kinda a bummer. So I figured I'd start over with a shorter, lighter update on my surgery and then I'll go back and finish the other post for those of you who want to know every micro-detail of my fabulously interesting life. ;)
* Surgery was a week ago - May 21st. Everything went fine, no complications. I have five incisions on my stomach which hurt... especially when you forget about them and lean up against a sink when washing dishes or your hands. Codeine helps these things, but I only take it when I can't get to sleep.
* Unfortunately there has not been any progress regarding my sight. But it's a little soon. And the surgery was done to stop any more degradation... vision improvement would just be a REALLY COOL side effect.
* From the start of my pre-op diet to my surgery I lost 18lbs. This past week I lost 4 more. Holy crap.
I think that's all for now. If you have a question (do I really have to school anyone on appropriate vs inappropriate?!?!?), ask it in the comments and I'll answer!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Friday, May 21, 2010
Today is *the* day!
Hello everyone. Just a very quick update that my surgery is today at 10:40am. I'm not really sure how long the recovery is going to take, but as soon as I'm mobile you can bet I'll be here letting you know how it all went!
Thanks again for everyone's love and support! You all ROCK!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Thanks again for everyone's love and support! You all ROCK!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Thursday, May 13, 2010
SIGHT?
Unfortunately this is going to be a quick update as my sight hasn't been great for the past couple days. The weather plays a huge role: when the sun's out it makes it much easier for me to see. Also, because my condition is cause by fluid, my sight changes as the fluid moves around my optical nerves. So basically everyday is a sight surprise! On the plus side, my back and head pain has been tolerable and I haven't had to rely on any painkillers.
I am just over a week away from my surgery which will be happening on May 21st at 10:20am. I'm caught up on my paperwork and bloodwork. I've spoken to the anesthesiologist and pharmacist, both who assured me that after the procedure there will be discomfort rather than pain. I found that encouraging.
I'm nearing the end of Week 2 of the meal replacement program. Please allow me a moment to bitch and moan about it: I'm allowed 3 protein shakes per day plus certain vegetable (most of which I would never voluntarily eat). So for the past two weeks I've been living off cucmber, asparagus, lettuce, baby bok choy, broccoli and mushrooms - all of which can only be flavored with lemon, vinegar, or herbs. Not too bad you say? Try it for 3 weeks and then let me know how you feel! There is a method to this madness however: to reduce the size of your liver and the fat around it so it is easier to insert the band. Needless to say, though, I've been dreaming of food and have been fighting weird cravings.
On the money front:
- A HUGE thanks to all of you who have donated!
- Please keep donating! Unfortunately our bills won't magically disappear after my surgery (although that'd be awesome!) It doesn't have to be much... just a loonie or two. Believe me, I know times are hard!
- A variety of fundraising events are being discussed. As soon as things solidify a bit more I will be posting details here and on Facebook.
- BUSINESSES: If you are interested in having donation containers in your establishment, please email me at kaoticekko [ at ] gmail [ dot] com.
Thanks so much for your support everyone! You ROCK!
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
Thursday, May 6, 2010
BLINK!
Some of you may have wondered where I've been this past month: fewer FB updates, unanswered emails, no blog posts, no new product, and even backing out of The Bazaar of the Bizarre and The Comedy Cabaret (both decisions KILLED me inside!) Well, here's what's been going on:
About four weeks ago I started having the worst headache. It felt like someone had taken a baseball bat to the back of my head. I went to an urgent care clinic and was diagnosed with a tension headache, treated, and released. I gave it a few days and the pain wasn't subsiding so I went to my family doctor who prescribed some meds and sent me home. Went back to a Doctor because I was still in pain and I was now having trouble seeing. He sent me to get a CT scan. So off to the urgent care clinic (because who wants to wait at ER?!?!?) Clear CT. Went back to family Doctor to say the CT was clear and she sent me to the ER.
Toronto East General Hospital. Tuesday 2:30pm. I was admitted to the ER at 11:30pm. Not too shabby. The ER doc takes one look at me and says, "I think I know what's wrong."
Super. Please share.
"Pseudotumor Ceribri."
Sounds lovely.
What that means essentially is that my body has too much spinal fluid, which is pushing on my head and spine causing pain and pressing on my eyes causing gradual loss of sight. It's most prominent in overweight women of child-bearing age although it's not extremely common.(I couldn't have won the lottery?!?!?)
So, what now?
Plus we have to save ever penny. Did I mention my lap band surgery isn't covered by OHIP or my private insurance? Even thought it's emergency, not vanity we will have a bill of $16,000 coming our way shortly! (There is a PayPal button on the right for making donations. We hope you can help us out, but we do understand times are tough!)
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
About four weeks ago I started having the worst headache. It felt like someone had taken a baseball bat to the back of my head. I went to an urgent care clinic and was diagnosed with a tension headache, treated, and released. I gave it a few days and the pain wasn't subsiding so I went to my family doctor who prescribed some meds and sent me home. Went back to a Doctor because I was still in pain and I was now having trouble seeing. He sent me to get a CT scan. So off to the urgent care clinic (because who wants to wait at ER?!?!?) Clear CT. Went back to family Doctor to say the CT was clear and she sent me to the ER.
Toronto East General Hospital. Tuesday 2:30pm. I was admitted to the ER at 11:30pm. Not too shabby. The ER doc takes one look at me and says, "I think I know what's wrong."
Super. Please share.
"Pseudotumor Ceribri."
Sounds lovely.
What that means essentially is that my body has too much spinal fluid, which is pushing on my head and spine causing pain and pressing on my eyes causing gradual loss of sight. It's most prominent in overweight women of child-bearing age although it's not extremely common.(I couldn't have won the lottery?!?!?)
So, what now?
- Well, I was in hospital for a week having all sorts of fun tests including a spinal tap to remove fluid (they are not nearly as bad as everyone thinks!)
- Was put on Diamox, a medication intended to slow spinal cord production.
- LapBand Surgery - they believe the quick weight loss will allow the spinal fluid to drain and hopefully I'll get some of my sight back.
- Optical Nerve Sheath Fenestration Surgery... basically eye surgery to drain some spinal fluid. Kinda gross... I don't even wanna think about it. Look it up on your own. It only lasts for 6 months and there is a 1% chance of going blind.
Plus we have to save ever penny. Did I mention my lap band surgery isn't covered by OHIP or my private insurance? Even thought it's emergency, not vanity we will have a bill of $16,000 coming our way shortly! (There is a PayPal button on the right for making donations. We hope you can help us out, but we do understand times are tough!)
♠ ♣ ♥ ♦ Yes I'm in the shop, but so are fine vintage sports cars! You still can buy amazing things by checking out my SHOP and these other fine establishments:
Plastic Wrap, Trap Door, The Rage, and Ransack the Universe! All awesome and all in TO!
I might even be up for some shows too if someone were to take on the the not-so-flattering job of making sure I don't fall down, I don't break anything, and that no one pays me in wooden nickels! WOW! I can see the line forming fast!!!)
Anyway, I'll still be moseying around and thanks for all the support! You all ROCK!
Creepily yours,
Mel
Melissa Hamel-Smith:
Owner and Artist of Kaotic Ekko's Curiosities
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